I Had No Idea

I had no idea.

That’s the theme of National Eating Disorder Awareness Week, which starts today. It also describes my reaction when I looked over the information and started to glimpse just how negatively eating disorders affect the lives of those impacted.

Some statistics that particularly struck me are:

-       Eating disorders have a higher death rate than any other mental illness

-       20% of those with anorexia will die from resulting complications

-       Young people (ages 12-25) make up 95% of those who have eating disorders

-       Teenagers are so concerned about their weight that over half of girls and one-third of boys try to control it by using such measures as fasting, smoking, skipping meals, vomiting, and taking laxatives

-       Almost 20 million women and 10 million men will suffer an eating disorder at some point in their lives

When I take a minute to really think about this, I’m overcome with both sorrow and anger.

Sorrow for those who are suffering so much that they feel the need to risk their lives simply to meet an almost impossible goal. (Only 5% of American women have the body image portrayed as ideal.) Sorrow, too, for their families and friends, who lose a loved one.

Those who don’t die may still be lost in a different way, becoming so focused on their weight that it takes over their lives. Mary Pipher described this problem in her book Hunger Pains in discussion of anorexic patients: “They didn’t expect to have fun or to find human interaction rewarding. Their lives had become relentless, grim encounters with scales and calorie charts.” (p.65)

But my anger is even stronger. Our society spends so much time and effort convincing us to be ashamed of our bodies, telling us that we are overweight because of a moral failing, a lack of willpower, sheer laziness on our part.

Yet no one bothers to teach us that 95% of those who lose weight by dieting gain it back, or that dieting can lead to eating disorders, or that those eating disorders could result in death.

The reality is that eating disorders are not lifestyle choices. They are serious and chronic illnesses that can be treated effectively, but the best treatment is to prevent them from happening to begin with. With increased education about the damage of these illnesses, and increased emphasis on positive body images starting with young children, perhaps we can stop eating disorders before they even begin.

But the first step is awareness. For those of you who, like me, had no idea, please take some time to learn about the reality behind these illnesses and share with family and friends. For those who already knew, I hope that you, too, will take a few minutes to spread the word. As NEDA suggested, just do one thing. Every step helps.

No More Judging Eyes

As an adolescent, my parents closely observed what I ate, concerned as they were about my growing weight.  Nor were they the only ones. Other family members joined in, as did fellow students. Eventually I felt watched and judged almost constantly, both for what I ate and the simple fact of my super-sized body.

I never fully realized how much that impacted me until one summer in college when I lived by myself. It was pure accident, since I was living on-campus and other roommates had been assigned to the four-person apartment, but they never showed up.

It gave me the most incredible sense of freedom.

For the first time since early childhood, I didn’t worry about hiding what I ate from anyone. If I exercised, I didn’t feel anxious about someone seeing me jiggle or gasp or turn red and sweaty, or see how my stomach and chest and thighs got in the way.

And this is the irony. With no one to watch over my weight or appearance so closely, I did something I had never done before: I voluntarily started an exercise program. I began cooking and ate more healthy foods, and while I still had sweets, they were generally homemade.

What a glorious time! I don’t know that I lost weight, but I grew stronger, and felt better physically and emotionally. I grew hopeful for the first time that maybe I could actually lose weight.

Unfortunately, my idyll came to an end in September when three field hockey players moved in. I stopped exercising. My eating habits slipped. I felt judged simply by their athletic presence. I lost that hopeful glow.

But I didn’t forget the experience. After I graduated and moved back to Maine, I got my own apartment as soon as I could, wanting to taste that freedom again. It was as wonderful as I remembered.

It’s probably no surprise that when I lost weight, I did it while living on my own, away from other eyes. Nor is it a surprise that I still struggle with social eating at times because I know I’m being watched, even if not judged. It doesn’t happen all the time, and it gives me hope that eventually I will get past that sense, too, and truly feel freedom in what I eat.

Extreme Measures

I know that many diets have been popular over the years, but looking at some of the examples in a recent article on CNN.com, I was astonished all over again at the extreme measures some people are willing to take in an attempt to lose weight.

For instance, I didn’t know that Lucky Strike created an ad campaign in 1925 to leverage the fact that cigarettes are an appetite suppressant. The ad suggested, “Reach for a Lucky instead of a sweet”. Admittedly the company may not have realized the long-term implications of cigarettes at that time, but even now, some people don’t want to give up smoking because they might gain weight. In other words, the stigma associated with smoking, plus the significant health concerns, is still somehow better than putting on a few pounds.

A new one to me was the Sleeping Beauty approach, perhaps because I’m not an Elvis fan. The idea is that if you go under sedation for days at time, you’ll lose weight simply because you won’t be consuming any calories. Which is true, although what happens when you wake up? Certainly you’ll start eating again, and are likely to gain the weight back. And is it really worth giving up whole periods of your life to lose a few pounds?

Even more disturbing (to me, anyway) are attempts to use a tapeworm to lose weight. According to one article, it is possible that you’d lose weight. But you’ll also lose health, and possibly brain functioning, sight, and your life. So probably not the best approach, since even if you lose weight, you clearly won’t be able to enjoy that fact.

Admittedly most diets aren’t quite this extreme, but the fact that these even exist is a painful reminder of how we regard obesity. Is this really the message we want to send, especially to our young people, that our health and our lives are worth risking in order to achieve some ideal weight?

It certainly wouldn’t be my choice. Rather, I would advocate for something like weight-blindness, so that people could see each other for who they are, not what they weigh. I know we’re a long ways from such a world, nor do I know if we’ll ever achieve it, but it seems like a better direction to go than these various efforts that, ultimately, only result in more pain.

Mindful Eating and the Super Bowl

Note: For information about the Am I Hungry? Mindful Eating program, visit www.AmIHungry.com or visit my website.

I’m not a sports person, but I’d have to be living in a cave not to know that the Super Bowl is today. And while I’ve never attended a Super Bowl party, I’m well aware that these are food-focused events. Even so, I was astounded when I saw on Wikipedia and the sheer amount of food people that go through.

“Super Bowl Sunday is the second-largest day of food consumption in the United States after Thanksgiving…. Rather than a sit-down dinner, on Super Bowl Sunday food is usually served buffet style. Foods that are traditionally eaten on Super Bowl Sunday include buffalo wings, pizza, chili, potato chips, and dipping sauces…. Roughly 28,000,000 pounds (13,000,000 kg) of chips which if laid end to end would stretch for 293,000 miles (472,000 km), 90 million chicken wings, and 8,000,000 pounds (3,600,000 kg) of guacamole are consumed during the Super Bowl, if all the guacamole consumed was to be spread over a football field the spread would be 11.8 feet deep.”

At first I couldn’t understand it. Thanksgiving makes a little more sense to me, with its focus on abundance, but this? As I thought about it more, though, I realized that a bit part of the reason is likely the difficulty of making this a mindful eating experience.

To illustrate, I’ll go through the Am I Hungry? mindful eating cycle with the Super Bowl in mind.

Why are you eating?

Enthusiasts likely eat on Super Bowl Sunday not only because it falls around a mealtime, but because it’s a social occasion, and it has the weight of tradition. Without the food, it just wouldn’t be the same. In short – you’re not necessarily eating out of hunger.

When are you eating?

This largely depends on how early you gather, who’s hosting, and when they put out food – all of which may have nothing to do with hunger. Even if you’re the host and have control over the timing, you may feel pressure to provide snacks out as soon as anyone arrives.

What do you eat?

Even I know that certain foods are as synonymous with the game as popcorn with movies, as noted by Wikipedia. None of them are particularly light, although some articles offer suggestions for healthier variations. I also noticed that most of these foods are easy to eat with your hands, or at most a spoon.

How do you eat?

Which brings me to how people eat. It can be difficult to focus on eating in any social situation because you’re talking with others, and it becomes even more so when you add in concentrating on a game. Additionally, you’re not sitting at a table, and it’s not a particularly calm or relaxed atmosphere, since those who are really invested may jump up in excitement or dismay, or talk to the TV.

How much do you eat?

That, in turn, certainly contributes to how much people eat, which is clearly a lot. If you have access to a constant stream of food, much of which probably tastes good (at least initially), without really focusing on it, it’s very easy to just keep going until the game is over, or the food is gone, or you’re stuffed.

Where do you spend your energy?

And then what do you do? Given the length of the game (and what time zone you’re in), you may well just be going to bed, although depending on how much you’ve eaten, you may not sleep well that night. You may be so caught up in the emotions of the game that you don’t even notice how the food made you feel, unless it’s really making you miserable. But likely, your next steps are still on the game, and not about being mindful.

Considered in that light, eating mindfully on game day is a considerable challenge. But if you’d like to try, here are a few suggestions:

• Try to be hungry (but not too hungry) when the event starts
• Only pick the foods you really, really want
• Notice how many times you’re tempted to re-fill your plate or bowl
• Split your attention between the food and other stimuli
• Let your hunger and fullness guide your eating

After all, you want to enjoy the food as well as the game and your friends, and that’s easier to do if you bring some mindful focus.