Conference Food

It never ceases to amaze me how much food my company provides at our conferences – and not always of the healthiest sort. It definitely seems to have a correlation with being a private company. For instance, I also attend conferences put on by a non-profit, where meals are on your own, and snacks are fruit, pretzels, popcorn, or maybe cookies. They also tend to be held in places where the food is reasonably-priced – but not so with my company’s recent conference.

Since we were staying in Miami this time, I nearly had a heart attack looking at the dinner prices of the hotel restaurants, where low end entrée items were around $25 (high end was $50-$80). A fruit cup cost $9.50, and the bottled water in the hotel room was $10. Also, the food provided left a little to be desired at times for those trying to be healthy. Here’s a list of what they fed us this past week.

Breakfast

This was the same every day (which got old) and consisted of: danishes; muffins; mini boxes of cereal, but with only cow’s milk to put on it; yogurt; fruit (pineapple, cantaloupe, honeydew, watermelon, raspberries, blackberries, and blueberries). Not too bad, but difficult to get protein, especially if you have dairy problems.

Lunches

Some of these were better than others, although again, not often friendly to the dairy-challenged.

Sunday: We were on our own here, so I got an overpriced tuna salad, with pita bread wedges that were alternately stale and soggy, supplemented with my own yellow bell pepper.

Monday: Green bean salad; roasted tomatoes with prosciutto; tomatoes with mozzarella; turkey and Swiss sandwiches; chicken club sandwiches; a vegetable wrap (all sandwiches had cheese); and desserts of brownies and tropical fruit salad.

Tuesday: Basic salad (lettuce, tomatoes, olives, red onion); macaroni salad; coleslaw; and various sandwiches, all of which had cheese – portabella mushroom, pulled chicken, roast beef, turkey, and ham. Desserts (also doubling as our afternoon snack) were: chocolate mousse cups; coffee-flavored éclairs; Rice Krispie squares; pink marshmallows (which seemed very random), and little tarts with raspberries.

Wednesday: Chicken tortilla soup; tortilla chips with salsa, salsa verde, guacamole, and sour cream; rolls and butter; fruit salad; black bean and corn salad; avocado, cucumber, lettuce and tomato salad; shrimp in lime vinaigrette; pulled chicken; pork; beef quesadillas; refried beans; with corn or flour tortillas. Desserts were: guanabana tarts, tres leches cake, Diablo chocolate cake, toffee banana cake, guava mousse, creme catalana, and chocolate and mango pudding.

Dinners

Sunday: Most pathetic dinner ever at an event, I think because it was employees only pizza that had gone stone cold and congealed by the time we were allowed to eat (over an hour after it was delivered), and one lonely salad for all 20+ employees. Luckily I’d known about the pizza issue and got a grilled snapper with salsa wrap beforehand, which held up quite well despite sitting for so long.

Monday: This was our welcome reception, with various stations of food. Build your own burrito with flour or corn tortillas; chicken or mahi-mahi, with add-ons of salsa, salsa verde, guacamole, source cream, lettuce, tomatoes, corn, and rice (noticing a theme?); seafood or vegetable paella; beef; bits of spicy gazpacho soup; shrimp with coconut foam. Desserts were: banana rum truffles (very tasty); cheesecake lollipops (coated in chocolate); mini key lime pies, and almond and passion fruit "cigars" (wrapped in chocolate).

Tuesday: I was on my own, and had a ridiculously expensive dinner of seaweed salad, with shrimp and vegetable tempura, including only two small pieces of shrimp, for $33!

Wednesday: The Gala event. Appetizers were: vegetables and dip;; a fruit plate; cheese and crackers; BBQ chicken skewers; bite-sized spanikopita; shrimp and cocktail sauce; pita and roasted red pepper hummus; and some bruschetta with beef. Dinner itself was: rolls and butter; salad with options to add egg, bacon, or cheese; pasta; sweet potatoes in cheese sauce; tilapia; roasted vegetables; freshly-carved roast beef. Dessert consisted of a wide variety of cakes, such as cheesecake, key lime, banana, chocolate, vanilla, and more.

Conclusion

And lest I forget, at the evening reception and gala events, alcohol flowed free and fast. With all of that, it’s sometimes easy to give in to temptation and the pressures of social eating. And so it was very nice, and a good reminder, to talk to a woman who has known me since my heavier days, and have her tell me how impressed she was that I had kept my weight down for over 7 years. She even said, “You’re my hero for that.” I have to say, hearing that was sweeter than any dessert.

Food and Dating

I didn’t start dating until I had finished losing weight, which was deliberate on my part, but it turned out to be a good thing for reasons I hadn’t even considered at the time. The decision was because I wanted to focus on getting healthy first, and I wanted to be at a point where I was happy with my life before I involved anyone else in it. (It didn’t occur to me that being thin didn’t necessarily equate with being happy, or that I might want some adjustment period, until much later – but that’s another subject.)

But when I started dating, I quickly realized that it’s rather perilous for people who are trying to be more conscious of what they’re eating. After all, what’s the first date option that springs to mind? Go out to dinner. It’s expensive, for one, though often more for the men, at least initially. The real problem, though, is what to order, and how much to eat.

I never intended for my date to pay exorbitant rates for dinner. At the same time, I wanted to make sure I had some fresh, non-starchy vegetables, which often meant ordering a salad (dressing on the side, please). For places that don’t include a salad with the entrée, this starts to add up.

The entrée options were also a bit tricky at times, depending on the type of restaurant. Less expensive ones tend to offer full plates, sometimes over-full, and it’s hard to judge how much oil or butter might go into something to add hidden calories. Whereas some of the fancier ones serve quite small portions for the meal, and no matter how elegantly arranged they are on the plate, it’s still not a lot of food. As noted in earlier entries, there are times when I can eat ridiculous amounts, and so occasionally I opted for dessert – but then that might prove to be too much, and I’d go home with a slightly upset stomach.

It also made me feel rather self-conscious because I discovered that I could eat considerably more than my dinner partner. One guy even commented, “You’re an eater, aren’t you?” I didn’t really know how to react, but I felt a bit ashamed and embarrassed at how much I had managed to consume. Then I hated the fact that he made me feel that way, and so that didn’t end up going anywhere. (There were other reasons, too.)

But that brings me to another unexpected peril of dating – judgment. And not just from the guys. I found that I was starting to judge my dates by what types of food they ate, or were willing to try. Or if they ate at all. One guy I went on a date with said that he only really ate one meal a day, typically at lunch, and that gave me pause. Would I be okay not sharing breakfast or dinner with someone? After all, sharing meals is often a good way to connect after a day apart. And if someone was a meat and potatoes type of person, who was incredulous at the concept of vegetarian meals, or who didn’t like any vegetables, would we be able to eat harmoniously? If we traveled together, would we only end up at safe, chain restaurants, they type I tried to avoid, or would he be willing to try new, more exotic offerings?

I had always thought that once I got past my own eating issues, food would no longer be a source of contention between me and other people. How wrong I was.

Bullying

I’m shocked! Did you know that fat kids are more likely to be bullied than skinny kids? Who would have guessed?! Thank goodness a study was done to shed light on this!

I don’t mean to belittle researchers or those conducting studies, but this one seemed so blatant as to be an inexcusable waste of money. Admittedly, the article I read did note that any schoolchild, or anyone who ever had been a schoolchild, would know this. The primary “surprise” was that other social factors didn’t seem to matter. Socio-economic status, race, intelligence, class standing – all were equalized by their fat to ensure true democracy in bullying.

What I would find interesting is knowing what form the bullying takes, and if it differs across genders. For myself, most of what I experienced was more in the way of harassment, my extra padding making it all the more likely for boys to pick on me in sexually threatening ways. Inappropriate comments, offensive sexual suggestions (way past innuendo), leering, etc. I know some girls also experience the unfortunate teasing of other girls who assure them that a popular boy really does like them, even if he doesn’t act that way. (The movie Heathers springs to mind.) I think for boys it’s different, more physical in nature, such as knocking over books, tearing papers, destroying projects, shoving, etc. But not having been an overweight boy, I don’t know for sure.

I suppose that, obvious as it is, the study is good if it does one thing – makes adults consider what sort of role models they are. Because the bullying doesn’t stop after childhood. It simply becomes more insidious and subtle, but no less damaging for that.

Hunger Pangs

Have you ever felt hunger as an actual presence, something so ravenous and demanding that it almost has a life of its own, so insistent that you cannot focus on anything but the need to assuage it? How about feeling this for no good reason? Not because you’ve been fasting, or exercising a lot, or are pregnant. You’ve just gone about your normal life and suddenly it’s there, almost knocking you down because it’s pounding so hard.

I never used to feel that way. When I was heavy, hunger announced itself more as a queasy feeling, getting a little irritable and headachy. But now that I’m thin, I’ve experienced hunger as I never have before. What baffles me is why. I can’t point to any obvious difference between days when I feel like a bottomless pit and days when I eat normally. I suppose it might be hormonal, having something to do with the time of month, but it’s not consistent enough to tell.

Just recently, for instance, I woke feeling moderately hungry and ate my normal breakfast. I didn’t feel full but didn’t worry – I rarely feel really full, especially right after eating. But this time, none of my normal tricks of appetite suppression worked. Not exercise, or drinking lots of liquid (especially something hot like tea), or chewing gum.

Previously when this happened, I would eat tiny bits at a time, flicking crumbs into the maw of hunger, concerned about how much I was eating. It didn’t really work, and I found myself eating almost constantly, but still continually hungry. This time, as part of my experiment to get away from the numbers game, I tried a different approach: I gave in to it. I let myself eat until I finally felt sated and my stomach was no longer controlling me. The result was consuming essentially a “second breakfast” (very Hobbit-like) just two and half hours after the first.

Having given in, I felt very focused and alert – and I didn’t get hungry again until supper, when it was a more normal hunger.

It was almost revelatory, making me realize I really can trust my body to tell me what I need. What an amazing concept! This was reinforced by discovering that thus far, in the three weeks that I’ve stopped weighing myself every day, my weight has been perfectly consistent. It’s a little sobering that it took me 7 years to figure this out, but I’m glad to finally be in this place.